Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Birthday Girl

My birthday was few days ago …that day , together with today's explosion, got me  into thinking of a rather funny question ….Can anyone tell me why am I still alive ?! Anyone?!! one might say, 24 years is not a lot… but I'm livin in a  war zone for god sake ….quite a few  colleagues and friends ,people my age, had already kicked the bucket and today I was thinking why it's taking me so long…
The irony is I didn’t get killed when the death poll in Iraq , few years back ,was  3000 a month that’s 100 a day… 2 and a half millions lives and still counting …I mean just do the math ,my odds are high ,so what's going on here?! Why on earth am I still here? Lucky or merely doomed?.. I don’t know anymore really
They say unless a man undertakes more than he can possibly do ,he will never do all that he can …I dont think thats true anymore 
The closest I came to death was ,3 years ago, when I missed an explosion by 2-3 min , I can still vividly remember waiting for my university  bus and once it left , the bus stop was like   BANG!! I thought I was lucky at the time, now; I seriously doubt that.
Not a birthday mode? totally agree …but  tell that to people who insist to make our life worse …tell that to ma seniors who think  I'm a robot  …. Well I'm not …I wish you can tell that also to the people I love…
I shouldn’t feel this way ….why shouldn’t I? coz no one has ever  felt what I'm feelin now?!you think that ? no one occasionally gets into fed –up-I- can't-do –all-of this-at once mode…this doesn’t happen to  anyone no?  ..Just me seriously mankind gimme a break I want to fall this time … I'm blue and I'm happy that I'm blue